The Men of the Dragon counseled hate. Jia saw the stains in the scarred earth, a black raw belly eating magic, leaving her people empty. She strutted at the memory of Honored Teacher Chen who'd complimented her conjuration. He was too kind saying her power would equal the Emperor of Sky's adepts away from the magic eaters. Her magic was simple.
Her village, Ordos, held beauty. She saw it in the half-finished statue of Buddha, his skull open to the sky, as if his soul had ascended to bardo awaiting his next life's journey. A pair of finches nested in the ear's scaffolding.
"Miss." Mr. Dog held a nicked knife to her throat. Three Mr. Cats surrounded her. One, blackened by mother earth's mines, rubbed his thumb over his finger pads. "Coin."
Jia dipped into her purse, two iron coins showing through the threads. She placed the coins, they would've bought her dinner, in the boy's hands carefully, like a butterfly. Her breath conjured a smile from the goons and the boy behind her dropped the knife away. They scattered.
Magic might not feed her stomach, but it could hide the hunger. She skipped towards home and her studies.
Nice story. I would have used magic on the boys. But maybe she did, huh?
ReplyDeleteA very eloquent mugging. Maybe she could feel that their need of the coins was greater than hers.
ReplyDeleteI must compliment you on that second paragraph. Gorgeous imagery, pure magic in that.
ReplyDeleteOverall, this had a flow and rhythm that somehow matched perfectly the story. Much enjoyed.
@Sonia, You got it right ;)
ReplyDelete@Steve, I'm not sure I would trust everything Jia says, but she would view it as you say.
@Rebecca, Thanks, I wanted to capture her viewpoint and that was what helped bring out the beauty in that paragraph.
I am so intrigued by your writing. This is very elegant yet so fragile. Very nice, good magic.
ReplyDeleteYou always build such expansive words in such short pieces - I'd love to see what you did with an extended piece.
ReplyDeleteA detailed picture painted with a few words.
ReplyDelete@Kwee, thanks. I like the idea of the fragile.
ReplyDelete@Icy, I've been working on short stories. I feel I muddy things as I work on that longer length but they are improving.
@PC, Thanks. I've been having fun seeing what I can conjure.
Hi there Aidan -- I really liked that line about Buddha's skull being open to the sky, and Jia placing the coins like butterflies. Plenty to get your teeth into here, despite this most modest of servings. Must be the magic.
ReplyDeleteSt.
Lovely little piece of otherworldliness, Aidan. =)
ReplyDeleteI've a little something for you over on my other blog, the one for when I'm not writing flash fiction. =)